Joke of the Day:
An Amish woman and her son are walking through a mall for the first time, totally stunned by everything they see. They are especially fascinated by two silver walls which slide together and then apart. They both walk up closer to the sliding silver walls. They see a fat, little old man waddle inside and watch as the doors close behind him. The mother and son can't believe their eyes when minutes later, the silver doors open and a tall, well-built stud strides out. The mother then turns to the son and says, "Son, go and get your father."

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Joke of the Day:
At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual, later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction. "Al-gebra is a fearsome cult, "Gonzales said. They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as unknowns, but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, "There are 3 sides to every triangle." When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."

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Have a safe weekend, don't party too hard and we'll see you all next week!

Joke of the Day:
One day at the rest home, an old man and woman are talking. Out of nowhere the woman says, "I can guess your age." The man doesn't believe her, but tells her to go ahead and try. "Pull down your pants," she says. He doesn't understand but does it anyway. She inspects his rear end for a few minutes and then says, "You're 84 years old." "That's amazing," the man says. "How did you know?" "You told me yesterday." 

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